I really wish I could hack my google account so I could change my fucking password lol. I used to love coming on here but i can only do it on this stupid tablet i hate using. anyway for those of you still listening out in the void, i’m almost 6 months sober off of booze. fucking c r a z y i used to drink so much and act so stupid. i’m glad my life is different now

haven’t been on here in a hell of a long time and that’s exactly why I’m posting this here: where nobody will see it lol.
I’m going sober today and I’m scared out of my fucking head. I’m not ready for superadvanced depression and paranoid anxiety but also I need to fucking regulate myself and my emotions. I’m constantly trying to feel so grateful for life but its hard when I can really only appreciate it when I’m high. I haven’t let myself feel anything in the past four years and I’m scared of what will happen without any crutch. I know I’m gonna completely fall apart and I’m not ready for it but I also know that constantly being high is the literal reason for all of this blockage and overwhelm that I will inevitably feel. I’m not ready but I’m so fucking ready to kick this thing. In the wise words of days n daze: fuck it!

I’m so happy. billy’s mom loves me, billy’s dad loves me, billy’s friends love me and i just always knew he was the right person for me. we should be getting engaged in the coming months once our finances are more stable and i couldn’t be happier to marry my best friend. i love him so much.

wahoorat:

*to the tune of we built this city*

We poopy shitty!!

we poopy shitty big fart butt hole

I look at all my last posts about billy and it’s just completely clear to me that we were meant to be together. i love this boy more than life itself i’m so happy we’ve been together for almost a whole ass year!

mushrooms are so fun to do

i haven’t been on here in a hot minute! i’ve been living with billy in our apartment and we’ve been dating for a while and everything is great and also i can’t see any posts on here. they all come up gray. i need someone to hack into my email lmao this shit is fucked. i miss tumblr